My Brother

I really don't know what to think when it comes to my brother. As far as I know, my parents always compare me to my brother. And because my brother's academics wasn't very good, my parents pinned all their academic hopes on me. Eventually, the stress was too much for me, and I kinda let it overwhelm me. Eventually, my grades started dropping... And of course, that led to more stress.

The thing is, I have never been interested in science and so I've never really don't well. And I've also never been good in maths. But my brother ABSOLUTELY LOVES maths and science and so he does quite well although his other subjects may not be that good. And because my brother is good in maths and science, my parents expect me to be just as good as him. But I'm not! Because I have absolutely no interest in maths and science. But I've been giving myself pressure over this... And the more I think about it, the more I find that my brother is so much better than me. I mean I used to at least win him in academics, but now, my academics has been getting worse and his academics has been getting better. And his character is so much Bette then mine. He is kind and generous and all that. And my parents think he's so sweet and always helps then save money and all that. While to my parents, I'm hot tempered and always spends money like crazy and all that. And the more I think about it, the more I think it's true. I can never compare to my brother. It's a no wonder my parents love him so much. But the thing is that sometimes I just find him so annoying and irritating and inconsiderate. It's like he thinks everything is all about him. For example, he and I both have the same Chinese tuition, but every time the teacher messages him about like changes in lesson times or dates, he NEVER asks me. He just thinks as long as HE is free, then it's fine. And sometimes he doesn't even remember he has something on and needs me to remind him AFTER I FIND OUT! Like sometimes he has medical appointments or appointments at the National Skin Centre (cause he has too many pimples :P) and be doesn't even remember and I have to tell him. He really expects the whole world to serve him and revolve around him. He thinks everything is just about him. Which is why I'm so confused. Because sometimes I just find that he is such a good son and he's so perfect to my parents all the time and I can't compete with him. But sometimes I just find him so self-centered and so selfish and inconsiderate. That's why I just feel really frustrated about it. I don't even know what to think anymore...